.mamamia.

.smile all the days.
.oh my GOD.
everybody becoming so emo.they are emo-ing.i'm not good in talking and comfort them.i use my heart to talk with you guys.because i really not good in expressing my feeling.i'lll not be so emo.i want my life happy and interesting.maybe i'll die on next seconds,minutes,hours,days,months or even years.i don't know.cheer up guys.ningning,i know ur papa was went back to indon already.pray for him.pray him is always healthy,happy and safe.don't be sad,your papa don't want to see that.you still having him as your papa.and me as your bestfriend(if you still want me lar).sha,don't be emo.everything will turn fine.try to think wider.narrow thinking will never help you,it will just let you in pain.everybody is hurt by the love ones,but there are someone will always love you.trust on GOD and loves him.Brand,come and take your guitar when you free.no,no,no..is when i free.haha..sorry brand,but your's guitar is really really so so so big.and.i learnt how to tune the guitar already.and also some codes and strumming.i just love it although it hurts my fingers.well,haiz.never mind.is not time to talk about it.i still love you guys.

.trip.

.hehe.

well,there's been 3 years that i never have a trip.just some problem bother of it.i have my trip to kundasang for three days two nights with my ko ko and his friends.that was so fun.i miss that time.the time full with happy and joy.no complication,no relationship(friends)problems.that's what i like.my ko ko friends,i meant my friends.stay with them was so fun.stay with very caring,mature and lovely people is so great.no emo,man.haha.well,they are the type of person no gossip,trust on whoever you are.they just so mature in thinking.i just try to be a person that try to look on my own weakness and not other people. i wish i could live in a village and not a town.

.EO.

.em-hem.
i having my camp youth start on 29th until 31st.that was totally fun.haha.well.that camp's name extra ordinary camp.well,i just done something that i thought i'll not do it forever to betray my own GOD.but i just think deeply and clearly.i live in world is to learn good things.i learning in the name of Jesus and also LAO MU.i'm not betraying my own religion.because i' m not doing something bad to my God.i open my heart and accept Jesus.HE is my father.HE asked me to forgive my father.i'll forgive him although it is very hard.is really hard.sometimes,when you did something bad,the sins do not come to you,but is your loves one.the very very important message in the camp is don't be hypocrite.don't be faked,man.what for you did all the bullshit nonsence things.and finally,i'll open my heart to all my friends,especially ning ning.i won't be so secretive any more.no more for that.i'll tell it when it is the time.well,honestly..me and ning.in the name of best friends.but we not really know each other.we didn't have a long chat.like never.i learned guitar also.that was so fun.i have my first prayer during the camp.i prayed to have my family back.i prayed my mama was back.i prayed that i need not to having a life like this.i just cried like hell that time.i just cannot let go.until now.but i know,that was Jesus accompany and tell me all the truth.and..there is ning..she always love me.i want to show my love toward her too.

.em.
well,well,well..ya,ya,ya..i'm updating my blog..haha..ya..updating..well,basically.i'm doing nothing in this week.nothing at all.well,some people ask me that:"do you have something to tell me?"ya,always.they always asked.actually,i have nothing to tell.really.i just learned how to let go.let go is the bested way to have a happy life.em.cannot denied that,i'm a human,human with some problems in my life.i cannot argue that are problems irritate my life.just i'm not the type who telling my problems to others.point of views help me to cheer up my life.i just look in a different way.the way that people seldom take it.i learned how to cheer up,how to stand up,how to fulfilled my life,how to work with them,how to socialize..just so many things in one times..that are the gifts that GOD and mama gave me..but i'm still learning..in the progress..never stop..as long as I'm see you guys are truly happy..emmm..well,another reason that why i don't want to my problem is.i have ever told a friend about my problem..but that person just like don't trust me.i'm not making a story.i never think something like that will happened on me..haha..

.mother's day.

i just forgot.HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY,MOTHERS.i just forgot about it.haha.i know i'm so bad.as soon my mum left me,i just forgot about it.i'm just felt awkward during the card-made class.i meant mother's day card.hay.i have made a card to my mum too.haha.i know teacher just realized about me.it's okay.i can take this.i still have my mum in my heart.she always be there.
honestly, i just wanna have a stable and normal life.just hoping my family and my friends especially my ning ning always happy and stay healthy.and...i just don't need any memories.
memories,when it loss.it just make me painful.i just need you guys to stay happy.don't fight anymore.just take it.

.humans.

.ha.
i just cannot do that.cannot.totally cannot.i just realized.my surrounding friend's friendship just cracking.you can figure out how bisa the human's mouth.really.human's mouth can let you in depression or even can make you die.just beware of that.i don't wanna be one of that.guys.really.your life is short.don't ever do something that betray your's nurani.

.experiment.

.ha.
i'm missing for a few days.i think.where i have been.ha.i just planning some thing.and experimental on it.ha.i just planned not to sleep.because as the usual me will be sleep like more than 10 hours.is true.i just don't know why i need that long nap.is like i never wake up from my sleep.after i woke up, i still felt sleepy and tired.ha.just wondering why."what did i do to myself?"."nothing."ya.NOTHING!!!gosh.my body system just made my laziness attack me.shu lar you lazy womb.and now.i'm fighting with it now.fighting with my body system.go against it's law.haha.wish me good luck.i'm on for 20 hours now.that's only 4 hours to sleep.i'm a human being also.i need to sleep,eat,pee,poop, and so on.