.missing part.

i cried because of you.i smiled because of you.i still remember.i miss pass.because there were me and you.together we survive together we living.love you mummy..

.mama.

is been a year..i'm sorry mum..for everything that i done or did let down your feeling.but mumy..happy belated..i love you always.like you do.and is 1 year anniversary that you went to happiest place.i'm happy of that..cause i know you will find your true happiness there.if you stay still here,i knew you will really stand so hard in purpose only to protect us.whatever things you done,the first thing that comes on your mind is three of us.i knew your heart is tired.mentally,spiritually and physically lost when you were sick.because you are not happy.when i saw you.my heart was tearing.i told myself that vision that i saw was not true..i told myself..that is only illusion.i scared.i don't know how to tell.i love you mum..and i miss you hardly..

.learning.

sometimes,i will just shut my mouth up because i think the things that we talk about will badly hurt somebody.i knew that feel.but the time we gather up.those things will gradually comes out.because we are imperfect.we are humans.we have different thinking.because of somebody have different thinking then the person will be listed to weirdo.is cruel enough.i will shut my mouth up.i will.cause that action hurt people badly.we are human beings.the same species living together in the earth.i thought we should help and love each other in purpose to fulfilled god's wishes.i just thought.i thought.but that only thought.only.simply thought no added any experience.but eventually we grow up.we know the fact.some fact that we have to know.we have to accept it.this only see how you apply in your lifestyle.i will only ignore it.i will.i don't want to miss down my life.i have my life.no matter how bad or how good is it.i would not blame it.because is my road that i chosen.

.still.

i will be good.not pretend but i trying to be good.in the way i am.although i have know the fact that somewhere is not perfect because human is not perfect.i will hold on what i have learnt in all of you.the bestest thing that i have saw in you guys.i just miss that time.never be polluted,still me.cause i holding extra strong in myself.i will holding on myself.i will depend on myself.i will extra love myself.i will love you all no matter you all still having me in your heart or not.still.

.am i.

.em.
recently.i am so tired in mentally.everything went wrong.is not the way i thought or wanted.not a better way though but a bad way.is exhausted.sometimes i will get away from crowded people cause i think.when i get near them,they will think differently about me.in the bad way i think.thinking and guessing that much is really tiring and exhausting.but what have certain people done or did to me is really..can i say cruel?is not cruel..but mean in my way.is really upset.i am enough of the way all of you are.but other way perspective.am i got anything wrong.am i? am i? am i?tell me please if i am really did wrong.gossiping to one and other is not the way you can help the person and solve the problem.but getting worse on it.please,this is not the way.

.reminder.

a reminder for myself must done so that i won't lost in mind.
do remember i'm not good enough
do remember god is with me
do remember mummy
do remember my family
do remember to pray a lot
do remember to clean my room everyday
do remember all my friends
do remember be humble always
do remember my dream
do remember smile always
do remember cannot lie
do remember treat people with a truly heart
do remember to be good with others
do remember let my mind be simple
do remember who i am
do remember i love all of you all